It’s the biggest shakeup to family law in nearly fifty years, and for legal professionals working in this arena it’s a whole new set of procedures – but no-fault divorces will also necessitate a change in approach to clients.
The no-fault divorce is something that many lawyers have campaigned hard for – some longer than others, so antiquated has the legislation been – but just because lawyers understand all the benefits and improvements of the new system, that doesn’t mean clients will.
It’s always a painful process; stressful and emotional, the actual legislation doesn’t matter to clients in that regard. That’s especially true when they feel feel wronged (or have been wronged) by their former spouse. Lawyers explaining that there is no blame in the new system won’t make them feel any better about the situation.
The overhaul is most certainly overdue but is not without its own particular, and new, challenges. How does someone explain that their husband or wife had an affair? That their former spouse ran off with their joint pension? No matter the wrong that has been committed, it now comes with increased irrelevance in the divorce process. That’s no great change from the legal perspective, but it is from the client’s, with many wrongly believing that blame will affect their legal settlement.
Of course this is a better system, removing blame and acrimony and conflict from the courts, and legal offices for that matter, will save a lot of time on everyone’s part and a lot of money on the clients’ for things that lawyers take on that, realistically, they shouldn’t be.
The emotional toll on parents, spouses, and indeed children is something that we, as legal professionals in family law, see on a daily basis. The only thing to temper the sadness, frustration, and anger is the sense of relief that it’s over, but even so, psychologically, the ability to “blame” the other party in the divorce process was the only way many felt they could be “heard” officially, despite the negligible impact on any settlements. It provided for many a sense of closure – at least, a little.
Herein lies the problem with no-fault divorce, and it’s something that family law lawyers and solicitors will have to contend with. A standardised process which is faster, more organised, and efficient is also one that’s colder, less empathetic, and more businesslike.
For something that has such a monumental impact on people’s lives it seems somewhat cold and clinical – especially when they can be served with divorce papers by email, without warning, and with no possibility to contest.
It’s also important to note that even though the courts no longer recognise or apportion “blame”, that doesn’t mean the couples in question won’t, and even where the application is joint, it doesn’t mean the split will be amicable. They will most likely still struggle to agree on things, and will most certainly still feel that same level of hurt and upset – which in turn will translate how they approach making settlements regarding their children, property, and finances.
And it’s those things – their relationship and finances, their family, their children, and their hopes and dreams for the future – that they want to talk about when the come to see a lawyer about getting divorced. It’s often the first time for many that they’ve even been able to voice these feelings without fear of reprisal, and it’s to a stranger.
While the law may have simplified (in one way) and become more clinical (in another), it’s still vital that lawyers and everyone else working in family law retain their empathy and understanding, that they remain a human face for an emotionally turbulent period of every client’s life and are not just data-inputters in a call-centre.
That said, balance remains just as important – legal professionals are just that: they are not counsellors or therapists, but that’s not to say they should be dismissive of clients’ thoughts and feelings of blame or shame, no matter what the law says. Acknowledgement, followed by recommendations or suggestions to get support – whether that’s through therapy, counselling, mindfulness practices, yoga or whatever else might work for the client.
Cases, clients, and personalities are all different, so a tailored approach with the right balance of sympathy and direction is key if legal professionals are going to bring about the best results for themselves, and the people who retain them.
