Family Mediation FAQs

Your most common questions about family mediation, answered clearly. If your question is not covered here, call us on 0333 567 1676, email mediators@wemediate.co.uk, or send a confidential message.

About Family Mediation

What is family mediation?

Family mediation is a confidential process in which a trained, impartial mediator helps separating or divorcing couples, and other family members, communicate effectively and reach agreements about issues such as child arrangements, parenting plans, and the division of property and finances, without the need to go to court. The mediator does not take sides or make decisions for you; they help you both reach your own agreement.

How does the mediation process work?

Mediation begins with an individual first meeting called a MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting), followed by a series of joint sessions facilitated by the mediator. In those sessions, the mediator helps you identify the issues, explore options, and reach agreements. You can read more about the family mediation process.

Is family mediation legally binding?

Mediation itself is not legally binding. However, if you both agree a settlement, it can be recorded and then made legally binding through a consent order drafted by a solicitor and approved by the court. This is common for financial settlements.

What are the benefits of mediation over court?

Mediation is usually less stressful and less expensive than going to court. It is confidential and flexible, lets you control the pace and content of discussions, keeps decisions in your hands rather than a judge’s, and fosters the kind of cooperative problem-solving that helps preserve relationships, which matters especially where children are involved.

MIAMs and the Court Process

Do I have to consider mediation before going to court?

In most cases, yes. In England and Wales, before applying to court for a decision about children or finances following a relationship breakdown, you are generally required to attend a MIAM to consider mediation and other options, unless a valid exemption applies, such as where there has been domestic abuse.

Did the rules change in April 2024?

Yes. On 29 April 2024 the Family Procedure Rules were strengthened to encourage families to resolve disputes away from court. Mediators must now explain all forms of non-court dispute resolution, not just mediation. MIAM exemptions have been reduced and generally require evidence. And a party who unreasonably refuses to attend a MIAM or engage in non-court dispute resolution may face costs consequences in court. In short, the courts now expect a genuine effort to resolve matters out of court first.

Can I still get a divorce without mediation?

Yes. Mediation is voluntary, and you can divorce without it. However, before applying to court for decisions about children or finances, you usually need to attend a MIAM to see whether mediation could resolve matters instead. The divorce itself and the financial settlement are separate things.

Costs and the £500 Voucher

How much does family mediation cost?

Our fees are clear and fixed. A MIAM is £130 on weekdays and £150 on Saturday mornings. Mediation sessions are £130 per person, per hour, and as sessions usually run for one and a half hours, a typical session is £195 per person. You can see full details on our fees page. We accept credit and debit card payments.

Is there any financial help towards the cost?

Yes. If your case involves arrangements for children, you may be eligible for the Family Mediation Voucher Scheme, a government contribution of up to £500 towards your mediation sessions. It is not means-tested and has been extended to March 2027. We check your eligibility at your MIAM and handle the application for you, so there is nothing for you to claim yourself.

How much cheaper is mediation than court?

Considerably. Mediation typically resolves matters in a small number of sessions at a fixed, predictable rate, whereas contested court proceedings can run into thousands of pounds and take many months. For most families, mediation is by far the most cost-effective route.

Timings and Sessions

How long does mediation take?

It depends on the issues and how readily you reach agreement, but most cases are resolved in a small number of sessions over a few weeks, far quicker than court, which can take many months to reach a final hearing.

How many sessions will I need?

Many families complete mediation in around two to five joint sessions of an hour and a half each, usually spaced a couple of weeks apart. Your mediator can give you a clearer idea once they understand the issues in your case.

Do I need a solicitor for mediation?

No, a solicitor is not usually present during mediation, and you do not need one to take part. Many people find it helpful to take independent legal advice alongside mediation, particularly before finalising a financial agreement, but the choice is yours.

Children and Finances

Can children be involved in mediation?

Yes, where it is appropriate and in their best interests, and where they are of a suitable age and maturity. Through child-inclusive mediation, a specially trained mediator can give children a safe opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings about decisions that affect them. The children do not make the decisions, but their voice can be heard.

Can mediation deal with child maintenance?

Mediation can help you discuss child maintenance and reach an understanding. It is worth knowing that voluntary arrangements about child maintenance may not be legally binding and may not prevent either party from applying to the Child Maintenance Service in future.

What if we cannot reach an agreement?

If mediation does not resolve everything, it is not the end of the road. You can consider other forms of non-court dispute resolution, such as arbitration or collaborative law, or, if necessary, apply to court. Because mediation is confidential, what was discussed is not disclosed to the court.

Can a mediation agreement be changed later?

Yes, if both parties agree. If your agreement was made legally binding through a court order, any changes would need to be formalised by the court. If it was not made binding, there is no legal recourse for non-compliance, which is one reason many people choose to formalise financial agreements.

Safety and Suitability

Is mediation suitable for everyone?

Mediation is suitable for most cases, but not all. It may not be appropriate where there has been domestic abuse or where there is a significant power imbalance. The mediator assesses suitability at the MIAM, and these concerns are also recognised as exemptions from the requirement to attend a MIAM. If you have any worries about safety, including your children’s, raise them with the mediator, in confidence.

Is mediation confidential?

Yes. Mediation is confidential and legally privileged, so discussions are generally not disclosed to the court. There are limited exceptions, for example where there is a risk of harm. Financial information disclosed during mediation is provided on an open basis and may be referred to later. Your mediator will explain what is and is not privileged at the outset.

Can mediation be done online?

Yes. We conduct MIAMs and mediation sessions online, which suits people who live far apart, have difficulty travelling, or simply prefer their own environment. Read more about online family mediation.

This page is general information about family mediation in England and Wales and is not legal advice.